Some Things Never Change

Chapter 8

“Wayne I’m sorry that you had to learn the hard way that crime doesn’t pay in the end. It might seem like easy money until things start to fall apart. Don’t be mad at Lou for confiding in me, she only had your best interest at heart.”

Wayne sat on the bed and found everything else to stare at except Michael. He felt disgusted with himself and the precarious situation he found himself in so he couldn’t quite meet his boss’ eyes.

“Would you be interested in going to therapy? I can’t force you, I can explain how it works and I highly recommend it.”

Wayne nodded. “I know how it works Michael. I recognize I need the help. I don’t know how things got so messed up. So go ahead and make the arrangements.”

“I’m glad you’re willing to take a step in the right direction and I will be here to help you along the way. You will be easily tempted to fall back into old habits, ignoring it won’t let your past go away. Discuss it, get it off your chest and move on with your life. If you want to be with Lou later on in life you have to be willing to make the necessary sacrifice and cut all ties with the drug trade. Or you will risk losing your current job and Lou, you don’t want that now do you.”

Wayne stopped Michael and asked him. “So how do you know so much about the recovery process?”

Michael took a deep breath before he answered.

“I’ve been through it myself, I started selling dope on the street corner, and then I did what most people who are in the business of selling drugs avoid doing, I tasted it and became addicted. It was the biggest mistake I could have ever made in all my teenage years. I ran myself out of business with my constant craving and I was willing to steal just to fund my addiction. Luckily, the last person I attempted to rob was a retired cop, who had a soft spot for children. He didn’t press charges but asked that I be allowed to be fostered under his care. The judge allowed it as it would be one less mouth for the government to be burdened with. It wasn’t easy but he curbed my rebellious nature, gave me books to read that fostered my intelligence. I was basically home schooled by his wife who was also a retired teacher. She encouraged me to get my GED and I won a scholarship to do arts at local university and look where I am now. I was a failure at one point in my life Wayne but I got out of that slump and so can you.”

Wayne stared at him. “Wow. I had no idea.”

“Yep. That is the story of my life. It isn’t something that I go around sharing with people but you reminded me of myself when I was young. You have the potential to do great things and I don’t want to see all that talent go to waste.”

He continued. “I’m an old man now, but I still have life and vitality, and I believe that we must guide our younger generation if we want better for our society just like someone guided me. We always have a choice in this life and it’s entirely up to us to make the right decisions, some of us need more guidance than others, we as men need to take our roles more seriously and train the younger generation the right way. I’m not perfect and I’m not complaining either I’m just stating a fact. No matter how bad you think life is for you, someone else out there envies you for the little that you have and would take the clothes off your back and the food in your stomach if given the opportunity. So when life sends you lemons make lemonade out of it and the best tasting lemonade too.”

Wayne sat back and smiled, listening to the older man talk with such passion, motivated him to be like him. He accepted his offer for help and went with him that very same day. He didn’t want Lou to resent him and he felt that she needed a breather from him.

“You got a beautiful woman who adores you, a car, your own apartment, money in the bank and your gainfully employed. It’s finally time for you to move on with your life and make better decisions toward a brighter future.”

“I’ll just be patient. It’s all gonna happen in good time.”

*****

Wayne had finally moved back home after his extended stay with Michael. All of Michael’s comments were like a song on repeat in his ears. He knew a struggle was coming when he couldn’t make money the illegal way and it scared him to be held back from making good money. He knew Lou was smart and he prayed she would forgive him for taking the cowardly route and skipping her house without an in person goodbye.

Two months had passed, he hoped her anger towards him would have cooled down by then. He liked the direction the new scripts had taken, it somewhat mirrored the way his life was going. He knew that to impress Lou he would have to pull off the best acting in his short lived career to make her forgive him of all his transgressions.

It was also hard coming to terms with the death of his best friend. He kept thinking that there was something he could have done to change the outcome of the war with the Bainbridge gang. He felt guilty for suggesting that they get involved in this lifestyle. Maybe if they hadn’t Sizzla would still be alive.

He attended the double funeral for both Sizzla and his cousin, they had died side by side and were buried the same way. Wayne felt haunted that he was alive when so ,any men had passed away. Even now, he haunted the grave site of Sizzla and poured out his sorrows. Always he left with a peace of mind like Sizzla was listening and encouraging him to move on with his life.

He avoided Lou because he had too much to deal with and he felt guilty about the way he treated her. Therapy had really done wonders for him. Finally he came to term with his past. It had always bothered him the way his father had abandoned him and his mother. It distracted him and he often did poorly when he was thinking about his father, he had his alcoholic mother to contend. She also smoked and from the early days of five years old, she would send little Wayne to the shop to buy her favorite beer and cigarettes. He grew to hate her habits because she often didn’t care if there was food in the house as long as she had her drugs to turn to, she was fine.