Turned By Him

Eliza found herself making her way toward Columbus Plaza and decided she would stop at her favorite coffee shop. On her way, she considered the possibility that George would be looking for her. Eliza had brought her phone and knew that George couldn’t do much for her right now. She wished she could do more for him. A twinge of guilt within Eliza ached as a nauseating and almost physical pain knotted her stomach. It felt as though she were hungrier than she had ever been. When she thought about it, she hadn’t eaten since the day before and dismissed the feeling as consequential to the stress of the past 24 hours. She had been there with Heather last night and George had come over so quickly. Eliza, who had always considered herself strong and independent, suddenly found herself feeling useless and unavailable.

“Cup” came into view on the edge of the plaza. The lights from within the bakery case illuminated only enough of the storefront to reveal that it was closed for the night. When Eliza looked down at her cell phone, she realized that it was nearly midnight. “The city that never sleeps,” she said resentfully as she pressed on toward Central Park and the Starbucks which was directly on the plaza. Sidewalks weren’t particularly busy; the cold weather seemed to keep most people inside. Despite wearing only a thin jacket, Eliza felt fine. She considered the possibility she was running a fever.

Once on the plaza, Eliza got a horribly uncomfortable feeling. A sudden paranoia in her fluttered and drew her to the brink of a panic attack. She leaned up against the wall and fell into the cold stone. She supported herself and attempted to catch her breath. It felt so strange, as though her body was experiencing an intense fear and panic but did not alert her mind as to why. She looked around the street. There were a couple others down the way but Eliza was certain that they didn’t see her. Driven by a strange drive not to humiliate herself, Eliza rallied her senses and the panic attack was over.

By the time Eliza had made it to the coffee shop she decided that a 20oz Hot Chocolate with extra whip cream and chocolate sprinkles was the only thing worth walking 30 minutes through the New York City winter to get.

Once Eliza stepped back out into the cold she felt rejuvenated. She considered walking strait home but the grief which drove her into the snow in the first place was still heavy on her mind. The apartment would seem so strange knowing Heather had been sitting next to her on the couch 24 hours ago. Eliza turned on her heels and walked toward the park. She resolved not to go in, too many dark places to hide in the park. Eliza loved central park however and had always felt Manhattan was her home with the park as her backyard. The island never seemed scary to her. Eliza was aware however, that she had lived a life of privilege and that New York City was a scary place to many.

After several minutes of walking, the panic which had gripped her before returned. This time, her body’s response was to physically run. Eliza didn’t understand why she was running down the sidewalk but something in her mind demanded that she flee. She rounded a corner and ducked behind a bush. As she peered through the leaves, Eliza realized that she had sprinted into the park. Though her breathing wasn’t heavy, the terror which drove her to run now paralyzed her. Through the leaves she could see a wooden bench next to a trashcan. The bench faced the large pond with its back to the sidewalk which wound through the park. Eliza was on the other side of the narrow concrete walkway several yards away. From her vantage point behind the bush, the New England style lampposts flooded the park with light. She could see down the pathway and paved stairs which led toward the plaza.

The air was still. Eliza could see her breath rising in thick plumes as she tried to stifle panic. She could hear the echoing of footsteps but saw no one. Her eyes panned the scene for any trace of someone else. The footsteps grew louder. Eliza pulled her chest into her knees, desperately trying to remain small and unseen. Eliza felt a tension grow in the air, as though strings were being tuned and robbing the park of its tranquility.

Suddenly, seemingly from nowhere, a man was sitting in the bench. His left leg crossed over his right, the man was sprawled comfortably across the wooden bench seat. She hadn’t seen him sit down or even approach. He bounced his foot up and down and seemed to be staring out over the water. Eliza froze and attempted to hold her breath. The man’s foot stopped bouncing. He looked over his shoulder and down the pathway. After a moment, the man rose from the bench and began to walk away. Before he had left the light of the lamppost he said, “You really should give me a call.” The words filled the park, the tension snapped and her mind was suddenly free of fear.