This Was Meant To Be

“I’m fine. I’m home. I’m… Harrison, he left.”

It clicked.

“You’re home, and safe.”

“Yes. He’s gone.”

Harrison heard the sadness in her voice and wanted to soothe her, and convince her that it was for the best.

“I’m sorry,” said Leigh, suddenly.

“No, don’t be. I’m coming over there,” said Harrison, making up his mind quickly.

“Oh, you don’t have to do that. I’m not going to do anything stupid,” Leigh assured him.

Harrison hadn’t even considered anything of the sort. How could he explain that he needed to make her feel better? That to have her sad was like the sun was being blocked, like the air was getting thin, like he needed more from life.

“I know. But I want to pick up a bottle of wine, get some sweet and sour pork for you, some kung pao prawns for me, and a whole mess of noodles that’s all fried and unhealthy. Then I want to bring it all over to you, and we’ll eat far too much and tell each other we won’t regret it. We’ll talk about anything and everything, and you’ll smile for me, eventually, Leigh. You’ll smile for yourself.”

Leigh knew she shouldn’t agree, but she was lonelier than she had ever felt before. She had wondered if home would feel like home again if Carl left.

But it didn’t. It felt empty, and she didn’t know how to deal with it.

Emily wasn’t home yet. Harrison knew how to cheer her up. At least, he knew how to deal with her. That was the next best thing.

“Thanks, Harrison,” said Leigh.

“See you in less than an hour,” promised Harrison, and hung up.

He was just going to be there for her, he promised himself as he drove to her place, stopping at a Chinese restaurant where he’d gone once and thought of Leigh because he’d known she’d love it.

Well, now he could take it to her.

He wasn’t going to take advantage of her vulnerability, he promised himself again. He was just going to be there for her, because she needed somebody to lean on.

It wasn’t like she had too many close friends. Leigh was usually well liked by people, but she didn’t let herself get too close to most people.

Besides, he knew that most of her friends were also Carl’s friends. He couldn’t blame her for not wanting to turn to them when she was trying to deal with everything that had gone down between them.

Knowing Leigh, he knew that she wouldn’t want anybody to have to pick sides over her, too.

He didn’t think Carl would be that generous.

At least Leigh was beginning to realize what a jackass the man was. Well, he hoped she was, as he got the order and drove on to Leigh’s place.

This time, he thought perhaps it actually was Leigh’s.

He was buzzed in immediately, and he heard from Leigh’s voice that she’d been crying. He had stopped and gotten lozenges, too, because he had anticipated that.

Leigh always got a sore throat after crying. He knew so much about her. But he still had so much to learn about her.

Leigh was waiting for him when he got to her door, and he saw that she was definitely down. She was wearing sweatpants, her hair was bundled up in a messy bun, she was barefoot and there wasn’t a scrap of makeup on her face.

Her eyes were swollen and her cheeks were streaked with tears. He felt a rush of rage for Carl, who had made her cry.

“Oh, baby girl,” said Harrison, and wrapped her in a hug.

He hoped the hug would say more than words could, because he couldn’t give her the words he needed her to hear, not yet.

“Thanks for coming, Harrison. I didn’t want to bother you, but I was feeling so low, and I felt so much happier last evening when I was talking to you. I just wanted to stop feeling so bloody depressed.”

“Don’t apologize, Leigh. I told you that I’m here for you. I meant it. You know I don’t say things I don’t mean.”

No, he didn’t. She knew that.

He walked inside, and walked to the kitchen unerringly.

He opened the right cabinets to get the right plates and glasses.

“You follow Martha’s system,” he said with a smile as he found the corkscrew and opened the wine with a pop.

“Wow, an actual cork. It’s fancy rich person wine, isn’t it?” teased Leigh, and Harrison smiled, glad that Leigh was feeling good enough to tease him.

“It goes well with the food. Now, first, drink two glasses of water. I know you’re dehydrated. You know it, too. You will probably get a headache tomorrow from all of that, but we can mitigate the damage before we hit the wine.”

As extra bribe, he took a carton of her favorite cookies and cream ice cream and put it in the freezer.

“Fine,” mumbled Leigh and had water as demanded.

She watched him as he set up on the coffee table, with a precision that he had always had, and she had always appreciated. Harrison moved economically, with a grace that was almost like a big cat. He didn’t make messes, and he valued the use of coasters, which was something Martha had drilled into Leigh and was now habit.

“That looks good,” said Leigh, finally, and was surprised when her tummy announced its readiness to eat with a loud growl.

“And you seem about ready to eat! Come on, dig in. Yes, you can have some of mine, but not all of it,” said Harrison, anticipating her question.

As they sipped wine and ate delicious but possibly quite unhealthy food, Leigh felt herself relax. Harrison wouldn’t ask her any pointed questions, she knew that. He wouldn’t push her to talk, not unless she told him she needed to.

Did she? Suddenly, she wanted to tell him everything.

“Harrison…”

“Leigh, you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. If it’ll help, then I’ll listen. But we can pretend none of it happened and we’re just catching up, too,” offered Harrison, his words full of such compassion and understanding that Leigh nearly cried again.

But she caught herself in time.

She was done with crying. No more of that.

“He left. I didn’t think he would. Even after our conversation last night, I thought that maybe if I gave him an ultimatum, he would think about what’s important and make a choice. I guess where I was wrong was in the assumption that that choice would be me. Us, I should say, I guess. He just turned it back on me, told me that he was going to book tickets by the end of the week, and I should get in touch with him if I wanted to go with him.”

Harrison took a slow, deep breath, because he knew that Leigh wasn’t ready to hear him call her precious Carl any of the names that were flying through his mind.

“Are you going to?”

Leigh shook her head firmly.

“Of course not. He basically gave me a version of ‘now or never’. I suggested that we take a break for a year, and we meet when he comes back. Depending on where we are, we could see where things go, I said. He didn’t want any part of that at all, Harrison. If I don’t give him everything he wants, exactly when he wants it, then he just wants nothing to do with me. How could I have meant so little to him? I thought he loved me, but you don’t do this to somebody you love, do you?”

Leigh didn’t find tears now; only bewilderment.

Harrison scooted closer to her and slid that comforting arm around her shoulders again. She leaned against him, and wondered and how much safer and less alone she felt when she rested her head on his shoulder.

“I’m here,” he promised, and Leigh fell asleep, without meaning to.

Harrison watched her sleep, stroking her hair gently, and wondered if she would let him give her the world.