The Man Who Saved Me

And, she realized, she knew she would lose him to work, sooner or later. She couldn’t stand in the way of that, either.

She couldn’t stand in the way of his real fulfillment.

Maybe Adam would never know how much he had helped her. She had spent more time on Leonidas, with him, in the last month than she had since her accident.

Maybe, now that it was spring, Adam could take a weekend off and they could go somewhere. Even if it ended in nothing more than a memory, she wanted to make more memories with him.

What else could you have, anyway?

Sometimes, it felt like the same old one-sided relationship she had been in with Fred. But the crucial difference was that Adam had never been dishonest with her, in any way.

Adam had always told her the truth.

At least, he had always told her the truth when she’d had the courage to ask. She had never plucked up the nerve to have the ‘relationship conversation’.

She had a feeling she wouldn’t like the answer, so, like a coward, she avoided it.

She felt like she’d been following the coward’s path a lot.

By the time Adam came out, wrapped in a towel, she had set most of it aside.

She grinned at him, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Looking good, doc. Got anything I can kiss and make better?”

When Adam crooked his finger at her, she went to him gladly. She kissed him with all her heart, leaned into him and loved him with everything she had.

She might not be able to tell him the words, but she could show him.

The kiss was long, soft and sweet. Her hands moved over his chest, resting over his heart and feeling it begin to beat harder and faster.

“This is too easy. It’s too easy to forget everything when I’m with you, Shonali. I can’t do that. I need to remember what I need to do,” he said, and that sounded like a warning.

But Shonali didn’t want to listen.

“I don’t mind forgetting,” she told him, but he only smiled.

He pulled on his shorts before coming to her. She could still see that he wanted her.

She could see it.

But apparently, that wasn’t what was on his mind.

Something was, though. She could see that.

She smiled, even if she felt as if everything was beginning to go wrong and there was nothing she could do to stop it.

“Shonali, we need to talk,” he said, finally, after he had them both sitting down on the bed.

Shonali braced herself for what was coming.

“Okay. We can talk.”

He was silent for a moment that seemed to go on forever.

Finally, he said it.

“I got a call from Doctors Without Borders again. You know it’s been a long time since I went on a mission. You know how sick I am of the work here – everything that keeps me from what’s important. I’ve been offered a new project, something where I can really make a difference. It’s in Uganda, and I’ll need to leave in a month. That’s how long it will take to get the paperwork sorted.”

And just like that, Shonali felt her world crumble, and it was all she could do to keep smiling instead of crumbling into a crying mess.