The Love Hotel

She had been shamed by her uncles and her brothers and pretty much every single person in her life and she was sick of it. Her entire life, twenty seven whole years, she had been trying to live life the way other people had wanted her to live it but no more. No more. She was not going to allow herself to be treated this way. She was not going to allow herself to be turned into other people’s puppets. She was going to live the way she wanted to live now, because doing it any other way, living the way that other people wanted her to live, had gotten her what she had just gotten a few hours ago. It had gotten her a cheating boyfriend, one that had lied to her about the fact that he was straight, one that had had s*x with several men over the two years he had known he was not heterosexual.

She realized this was what people did when you were a doormat. They took advantage of you. They made you feel like you were the only thing that they could afford to lose, because they never thought that they would lose you by doing something stupid.

She was done. She was completely and utterly done. She went to the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror. There was a full length mirror in the bathroom, the kind of mirror in which you could examine your entire body in. It was the kind of mirror that you could use to see all of the various aspects of your body and understand what it was that other people saw when they looked at you.

She looked at herself. She was a beautiful woman. Her skin was chocolate dark, a true dark, not the milky darkness that other black women had. She was proud of how African she looked, with her thick lips and flared nostrils and her curvy body. Her hips were absolutely incredible, they were the kind of hips that other women would kill for.

She had a lot of things to be proud of about her body. She had a lot of things that she had to offer any man. And this made her feel confident. She realized that she did not need a man in her life. They were the ones that needed her. They were the ones that would feel a deep seated desire to touch her body, to let themselves feel, if even for a moment, that she belonged to them. They were the ones that needed her, and she could use this to her advantage. She could finally get what she had always wanted. She could finally get the very thing that she had expected from her life, the very things she had thought had not been for her to get. She would finally be able to live the life she had always wanted to live and finally not have to feel guilty about it anymore.

She was so glad she was able to feel this way. She was so glad she was strong enough, in spite of the fact that she had been told her entire life that she was not supposed to be strong. She was strong in spite of everything. And this meant when she put effort into making herself stronger, she could become completely and utterly unstoppable. She could become the kind of person other people would look at and admire, the kind of person other people would want to be.

She thought about the fact that she was beautiful for a long time. She had never really felt beautiful with Seth. He had always been very horny while having s*x with her but if she was honest with herself it had made her feel like an object more than anything else. It had made her feel like she was some kind of s*x toy he only used for his pleasure, she was some kind of puppet he would fu*k whenever the desire arose within him. She wanted to feel beautiful on her own now. She wanted to stop feeling like the only thing she had to offer anybody was her body, and nothing else. She wanted to feel like she possessed actual worth.

She got into the shower and turned it on. The water was very hot but she liked this. It made her feel like she was scalding the memory of all that had once been off of her. After this shower, she was going to emerge a new woman. She was going to emerge as the Rochelle she had always wanted to be.