The Love Hotel

However, this was not the case, and when Rochelle entered her bedroom she saw Seth. She saw him naked. She saw him on top of somebody. And the person he was on top of was a man.

For a long moment, Rochelle was completely silent. Her mouth was gaping open. She honestly did not know what to say, what to think, what to feel. She was completely and utterly dumbstruck, to the point where nothing she could say would be able to properly describe just what she was feeling.

Time seemed to stop completely. She felt betrayed, yes she did. But she also felt shocked. How could this be happening?

Seth and the guy he had been on top of pulled away from each other immediately. They both looked at each other and then at Rochelle. “Ro,” said Seth, using the nickname that only he had used for her. “Ro, I can explain…”

She couldn’t believe it. She couldn’t believe that he would try to explain. What explanation could he possible give right now? What could he possibly say that would explain the fact that he had been fu*king another man in the bedroom that he shared with his girlfriend?

She also couldn’t believe he would have the gall to refer to her as her nickname. She couldn’t believe he would still assume the intimacy they shared with each other would exist even now, even after he had betrayed her so thoroughly. Was he really that callous? That stupid? What could he possible be thinking?

“You’re going to explain?” asked Rochelle, incredulous. “What’re you going to explain, Seth? What’re you going to say? What the fu*k?”

“Ro,” said Seth, getting out of bed and walking towards her, his hands raised. Rochelle looked away. She couldn’t look at his naked body. She couldn’t be as intimate with him as she had once been, not after this. She had some self respect. She did not think of herself as the kind of woman that would allow her man to do whatever he wanted without any repercussions whatsoever. No, she would not allow herself to be that kind of woman. She would be strong right now. She would make Seth feel that what he had done had been completely and utterly wrong. She would make him see that actions have consequences, and that the consequences of his actions right now were going to be so severe that he would regret doing what he had done. He would regret betraying Rochelle in such an insane way.

“Don’t come near me,” said Rochelle. She couldn’t help it but she started crying. She couldn’t help but despair. What else could a woman do right now, when the man of her dreams, the man she had thought loved her more than anything could do something like this to her? How could she possibly allow herself to feel anything but the most intense sadness anyone could ever feel? No, in this moment all she was going to allow herself to feel was going to be despair. She could not bear the thought of feeling anything else at all.

“Don’t come near me Seth,” she said. “How fu*king dare you? How fu*king dare you do this to me? After… after five whole years… three years of living together… how dare you fu*k someone else? Another man, Seth? Are you gay? Have you been gay all this time? We’ve been together for five years, you know. Five whole fu*king years and now all that I can see is… all that I can see is that all of those five years had been a complete fu*king lie.”

“It wasn’t a lie, Rochelle,” said Seth. “It wasn’t, I swear it. I mean… I just… I’ve never been with another woman, Rochelle. You were always the only woman I ever needed. You were always the only woman that I ever looked at, I swear!”

“Oh that makes me feel good!” said Rochelle. “That really makes all of this better! I’m the only woman that you’ve wanted to fu*k, great, excellent! What about men, though, Seth? Do you seriously not think that you fu*king other men is the same as cheating on me? Do you really think that after today we are going to simply go back to being the same way that we have always been?”

“No,” said Seth, “I know I’ve fu*ked up. I should have told you, fu*k I should have told you so long ago but… I never thought that you’d be able to understand and there would have been nothing wrong with that at all, there would have been nothing wrong with you not understanding because this is a difficult thing to understand…”

“What the fu*k are you trying to say?” said Rochelle. “Are you gay? Is that it?”

“I’m not gay,” said Seth. “Of course not. You’ve seen how I am when we fu*k. I can barely contain myself because you arouse me so much. I just… I’m bisexual. I had s*xual experiences with men in college but I just thought that I had been experimenting, I never thought that I would actually be you know… I never thought I would actually like the idea of fu*king other men so much. I thought I was straight. Maybe I was lying to myself. But after a little while I had to stop lying to myself, you know? I had to stop pretending that I was something I’m not. I’m bisexual, Rochelle. I should have told you before, but I’m telling you now and I hope that counts for something. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but… I just don’t think I would have been able to tell you. How would you have reacted if I had told you?”

“If you had told me that you may be bisexual?” asked Rochelle, gasping and sobbing. “I don’t know but it would have been a lot better than finding out like this, I can tell you that Seth! It would have been a lot better than me walking in on you fu*king another man! I might have been upset, I might not have wanted to be with you if you being bisexual meant that you wanted to have s*x with other people. I might have because you were having s*x with other men not other women, but I might not have been. But it was your responsibility to tell me, Seth. It was your duty as a decent human being, as my fu*king boyfriend, that you were doing this. What you’ve done… it’s fu*king inexcusable. You cheated on me and you kept something so significant from me. Were you ever planning on telling me or were you planning on lying for the rest of our lives? Were you planning on leaving me later on, letting me off easy? I don’t fu*king understand, Seth. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know how to feel. You’ve fu*king ruined me. I’m… I… I don’t fu*king know what to do.”

“I’m just gonna go,” said the other guy, the guy that Seth had been fu*king. He got up and got dressed as quickly as possible and left. Rochelle cringed as he passed by her on his way out. She couldn’t believe that this man had been fu*king her boyfriend. She could barely stand to think about him let alone get close enough to touch him. How could this be happening? It couldn’t be happening, her life wasn’t like this. She had been so happy just ten minutes ago. Everything had been completely and utterly fine. Everything had been happening just the way it was supposed to happen. She did not know what she was going to do now. How could she possibly get over this? How could she possibly move past the biggest betrayal of her entire life? This was going to destroy her completely.

“Baby,” said Seth, “Ro, listen to me.” He started moving towards her.

“Don’t call me that!” said Rochelle. “Don’t you dare fu*king call me that. I will fu*king kill you if you come close to me, do you understand? I can’t… I can’t even fu*king look at you right now. I can’t even fu*king think of… I just can’t. Get the fu*k away from me, Seth.”