The Heart Wants What It Wants

Oh, it hurt. It hurt so much to hear that. That was what he had wanted – an interlude. He’d thought that it was an interlude for her, too.

It hurt more than she could say.

She couldn’t say anything, so she kept quiet.

“But I couldn’t see a time when I would be okay with letting you walk out of my life.”

Now Diana did look at him.

She still didn’t say a word.

“I couldn’t see a time when I would be fine with letting you go. Watching you fall in love with another man, making your vows to him, having a family with him. Diana, I didn’t tell you all of it. I didn’t love my wife. Tracy – my ex-wife. I wasn’t in love with her. I know that. But I thought I was, and I did trust her. I didn’t treat her right, I didn’t put in the time and effort I should have, but I trusted her completely. She betrayed me in every way. She cheated on me, with a rival, and she gave him information about my company, might have ruined me. She betrayed me. But I couldn’t blame her, not after the anger had died away. She’d turned to somebody else and trusted him the way I had trusted her. She hadn’t known. So I let her go, and I swore that I would never trust anybody ever again.”

Diana wanted to reach out to him and soothe that old hurt away, but what could she do?

“I’m so sorry you had to deal with that.”

“But it doesn’t justify how I pretended to be blind to what you wanted. It doesn’t justify anything.”

“Feelings can’t always be justified. Emotions don’t always make sense. I fell in love with you. You didn’t love me. It’s not great but you know, that’s life.”

Diana tried to make light of it, but her voice cracked a little at the end.

Tears were threatening, so close. She couldn’t cry. Not till he was gone. She could cry when she was alone.

“I do love you.”

Diana wasn’t sure she’d heard right.

“What?”

“I do love you, Diana. I began to fall in love with you when I saw you talking to those damn donuts and carrot cake. I fell a little more in love with you when you looked at that carrot cake like it was your one true love. Every time you looked at me, every time I looked at you, touched you, I fell a little more in love with you. I didn’t want to be in love with you, but there you are. I love you. I love you, damn it!”

Diana’s eyes were so wide. She couldn’t keep standing. She sat down with a bump, still looking at him.

“What?”

“I love you, Diana. I love you, I love you so much. If you want marriage and a family, then that’s what you’ll have. I’ll do everything I can to give you everything you want, because you deserve to have everything you want. You deserve to be happy. I want to make you happy. If you need to be married to be happy, then we’ll be married. I love you. I’ve never loved anybody else like this. I don’t want to love anybody else like this. I don’t want to be without you. That’s marriage, isn’t it? Marriage is when you have to be with somebody, when you trust them completely, when you love them so much that you want to be with them. It’s when you’re sure of it. I am sure of it. I am sure of you. I want to marry you. If you want to be married. Diana, marry me.”

“What?” said Diana yet again.

She couldn’t believe her ears. She couldn’t wrap her head around it.

George was there, in Alex’s apartment, and he wanted to marry her. He loved her.

“Family – I’ve never been much for family. But I’m good with Estelle’s kids. If I’m good with Estelle’s kids, I can be good with our kids, can’t I? I can do it. I just need time. I need time to figure it out, to figure out how to do it, but I can do it. I’ll try my best to do it, Diana. Take a chance on me. Take a chance on me, trust me more than I can trust myself, and marry me. Because I love you. Because I don’t want to live without you.”

“You… You’re proposing to me?”

“Yes! Yes, I… I don’t have a ring. I wasn’t planning to. I’m proposing, and I don’t have a ring.”

Diana had never seen self-assured George look so uncertain of himself. He looked positively flustered.

“I don’t need a ring.”

“You do, I… I have this.”

He reached into his pocket and brought a box out – the first gift he had ever given her, that carrot pendant.

“I’ll get you a ring. I will. But for now – Diana David, will you marry me?”

Diana looked into his eyes, and knew that he meant it. She knew that it wouldn’t be easy, too. She knew that they would have to find many ways of compromising.

But she also knew that she loved him. And that he loved her.

What could matter more?

“Yes. Yes, I will marry you.”

He put the necklace around her neck, and finally, at long last, she could lean against him, wrap her arms around him. He held her close, and when he kissed her, it was like coming home.

It might not be easy. But nothing’s every easy if it’s worth something.

So Diana held on to the man she loved, and knew that she would do whatever it took to make both of their dreams come true. All of them.

Diana looked at herself in the mirror and couldn’t quite believe it. A lot could happen in six months, like failing to persuade your fiancé that he didn’t need to rush into marriage to make you happy. And getting married.

Her dress was simple – a long white column that skimmed her curves, left her shoulders bare. She didn’t have a veil.

“You’re beautiful, Di. Last chance to run, I’m honor bound to tell you that.”

Diana grinned.

“I’m good, Alex. Besides, I’m not running in these heels.”

“I have your sneakers, but you’re happy?”

“Of course I’m happy. Besides, we’re already married.”

They were. They’d done it at the town hall. They were married. Legally, they were already married. But her mama hadn’t taken kindly to that, so now they were having a wedding. It was small, and intimate, and held at home. It was good. Her family was there – all two dozen of her close family – and Estelle and her kids, and Alex as her maid of honor, and Trevor.

It was a family affair, because family was important to Diana. And now, family was slowly becoming important to George, too.

“He’s waiting for you. Not nervous at all because he knows you’re already married to him.”

Diana chuckled.

“Mama isn’t happy about this not being a Christian wedding in a church, is she?”

“She hasn’t been happy for the last month, and I haven’t been happy, either, because she’s let me know about how unhappy she is. Over and over again. But the last I saw her, George had her.”

“Then she will soon forget all about being angry.”

“The man does have a way. Even I’ve forgiven him.”

Diana grinned again.