The Heart Wants What It Wants

“Buckle up, Diana. We’ll have you home before you know it.”

“Thanks,” she murmured, but his attention was on his laptop again.

She took her own out and got to work, too. She might as well. But try as she might, she couldn’t focus, not when he was sitting right across from her, looking like he should be on the cover of some magazine for rich and powerful people. He was probably on a hundred eligible bachelors lists. He was a bachelor, wasn’t he?

They’d talked about her family, but they hadn’t talked about him. She’d just gone on and on about herself. And made a complete fool of herself, too.

“Do I have dirt on my face?”

“I… No, sorry.”

“Penny for your thoughts, Diana.”

“No, it’s nothing.”

“Now I have to know.”

Diana sighed.

He wouldn’t give up. She’d learnt that much about the man.

“I was wondering how many eligible bachelors lists you’ve been on,” she confessed.

George chuckled.

“Almost every year since I turned twenty-four, I think. That’s when I made my first million. A bit late by today’s standards. Well, except for the four years when I was married, of course.”

Diana’s brain went blank. Married?

“You were married?”

George looked at her now.

“I forgot. You really didn’t know who I was. Most people know. It was all over the tabloids. Yes, I was married for four years. We’ve been divorced for another four now. It didn’t work out so well.”

“Oh. So… Do you have children?”

“Not that I know of, and I’m pretty sure I’d know,” he told her with a grin.

But Diana’s mind was galloping along. He’d been married. There was a woman out there who’d been his wife.

He wasn’t married now. That was what mattered, wasn’t it?

“Do you have a problem with having gone on a date with a man who was once married?” he asked, and Diana shook her head quickly. A bit too quickly.

“What is it?”He persisted.

“I always wonder what went wrong when marriages break down. I mean… You must have been in love to get married. That’s why you do it. You’re in love, and you really believe that it’s going to be forever, so you get married. And then it doesn’t last forever, and… Well, that must do something to you. To how you look at life, and love. That first time, you really believe, but then when it’s broken, how can you ever believe again?”

George was silent for a while, long enough to make Diana worry that she had overstepped. Why had she said all that? Couldn’t she have just kept quiet?

“Maybe I never felt it.”

“What?”

“I don’t think I felt what you just described. Have you ever been in love like that?”

Diana was surprised.

“No. No, I’ve never felt it.”

“Then how do you know it exists?”

“I… Well, I know that my parents loved each other. My daddy died when I was about twelve, but that was long enough for me to see how much my mama loved him, and how much he loved her. I guess I want that.”

“Even if you saw the hurt it caused your mother when he passed away?”

Diana was a little shocked. Nobody had ever asked her something like that before.

“I… I think she felt it was worth it.”

“Did you ever ask her that, or did you decide it was because you wanted it to be?”

“I don’t think I want to have this conversation with you right now.”

His face changed.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Diana. I didn’t mean to pry, or open wounds. I overstepped.”

“No, I… I shouldn’t have started it.”

“No. I want you to feel like you can ask me whatever you want to. I’m sorry. It’s been a long day. I think maybe we should both take a break. Take a nap. Relax.”

“I… Yeah, maybe,” said Diana, and settled back. She closed her eyes but she couldn’t relax. She couldn’t sleep.

Had it been worth it for her mama? Diana didn’t know. She’d never asked. If it hadn’t been, surely her mama wouldn’t be so keen on getting Diana married. It was because she wanted her to have the same happiness that she was so insistent on it, wasn’t it? That’s what she’d always believed.

Diana wasn’t sure when he finally fell asleep, but she found herself being awakened to put on her seatbelt. The day had worn her out. She was groggy when they landed.

“There’s a car waiting for you. I’m sorry, I can’t take you to your doorstep like a gentleman should.”

“No, it’s fine. I mean, you’ve already gone above and beyond. I… Will I see you again?”

She really must have been half asleep or she would never have asked that.

“I hope so, Diana. Until then, I hope this reminds you of me.”

She thought he was going to pull her into his arms and kiss her senseless as he had done once before, but instead – “A gift?”

“I hope you like it.”

She took the small box, elegant and dark blue satin, that he offered, and he smiled at her and waved to somebody.

“This is Ron, Diana. He’s going to take you wherever you need to go.”

Ron nodded, and Diana found herself being swept off, clutching the box, feeling oddly disappointed. She didn’t know what was in it, but she would have preferred a kiss to whatever it was. She was sure of that.

Diana found herself in the car, and gave Ron the directions he needed. It was about two in the morning by the time she got home and crawled into bed, kicking off her shoes, so tired that she could barely think.

She still clutched the gift, which she hadn’t opened. It wasn’t the gift that was on her mind as she fell into deep sleep – it was that kiss that had shaken her to her soul.

That kiss that she knew she would never forget, no matter what.

The kiss that she was afraid might have branded her soul for him, for life.

“Get up, you lazy bum!”

Diana scrambled up, her heart beating so fast she thought it might burst right out of her chest.

“What! What, no! No!”

“Chill, Di, it’s me.”

“Alex! You scared the crap out of me, sh*t! Seriously, what’s wrong with you!”

“Looks like somebody had a heavy date and a heavy night. Ooh, what’s this?”

Alex grabbed for the box. Diana was just a bit too quick for her.

Alex sat on the bed and pouted.

“It’s twelve, you know. We were supposed to meet for lunch and you didn’t answer your phone so I decided to come and see what was going on.”

“It’s twelve?”

“It is. When did you get in last night?”

“I… About two, I think. God, I was so tired. I’m still so tired.”

“So, what’s in the box? It looks expensive.”

“I… I don’t know. It’s a gift.”

“From the hunky billionaire? I did some more digging. He was in the Forbes top ten billionaire hunks in the world. He’s been in it for almost every year for about a decade, so he’s been really rich for a really long time.”

“I asked him about eligible bachelors lists. I didn’t get that specific.”

“You have me for all that. So? Open it!”

Diana sighed.

There was no putting off Alex. There was also no pretending that it was too private and personal. Alex and she hadn’t had secrets in many years, not since they’d been roommates in college. Alex still looked exactly the same to Diana’s eyes – hair that was a perfectly cut dark red cap, skin that glowed golden, hazel eyes that sparkled, full of energy and vitality. Until she’d met George, she hadn’t thought that anybody could have eyes more impactful than Alex’s. She had eyes that twinkled so determinedly that they could drag you into as many messes as they wanted, without you putting up too much of a fight.

Alex was her soul mate, in the best sense of the word.

“Fine,” muttered Diana, and opened it.

“Oh!”

“What is it? Let me see!”

Alex clambered over to settle beside Diana and she sighed a little. It took a lot to make Alex sigh.