The easy decisions never led to profound happiness. They led to shallow rewards for petty goals. This was a life-changing decision, and she couldn’t afford to come to it lightly. She was going to have to make a hard decision about her life, and she couldn’t use anyone else’s opinion to sway hers.
“I can’t deal with this right now,” she said finally. “Help me forget that I have to leave for just one more day.”
She bit her lip, looking into his hazel eyes and trying to memorize every honey-colored striation, the way his lips parted when she laid her hands on him, and the way his carefully styled hair still ended up wild despite his best efforts. Slowly, she pulled herself out of his embrace and rolled out of bed.
Her legs were still wobbly as she made her way to the bathroom to shower and take some time to think. She couldn’t believe what she was considering, but she knew that the Kate of before no longer existed. General Kate Black was someone she hardly knew, and as she looked in the mirror over the sink and studied her own brown eyes, she admitted to herself that she hadn’t been that person in a long time. She was unhappy, and life was too short to be unhappy.
She hurried through her shower and got dressed quickly while Jason watched her from the bed.
“What’s going on?” he wondered, but she didn’t answer.
She was digging through the clothes and looking for her uniform. She found it, grimacing inwardly at the sight of it as she pulled it on and then quickly threw her hair into a bun. She sat down on the edge of the bed to lace up her boots, then grabbed a pair of pants for Jason and tossed them onto the bed beside him.
“I need you to drive me to the palace,” she said.
“I thought we had until tomorrow,” he said, looking stricken at the thought of her leaving so soon.
She wanted to explain, but she was afraid that if she did, she would lose her nerve. She wasn’t sure what her plan was, but she had to leave now before she changed her mind. It was bad enough that she would have to fly for hours before she reached New Hope, and she knew that the doubt would creep in the entire time. She wasn’t sure if she would ever be back, but she couldn’t wait a moment longer, and every moment wasted was one more moment that she couldn’t get back.
“Please, Jason,” she said.
He shrugged, and for the first time since they’d met, he looked angry. She knew that she was hurting him, but she didn’t know what else to do. She had to leave, and she couldn’t let his anger change her mind.
He sat there for a moment, and when she didn’t say anything else, he pulled on his pants and went to the closet for a shirt. He left the bedroom without another word, and Kate followed him to the house and into the garage where he kept his pickup truck.
They rode in silence to the palace, and more than once, Kate thought about trying to explain what she was thinking, but she didn’t even know what her plan was at that point. She just knew that she was going to talk to Pearce about his job offer, and then she was going to talk to him about early retirement. She wasn’t going to waste her life away behind a desk and, even if Pearce wasn’t receptive to the idea, she planned on making him receptive to it. This was her life, too, and there had to be some sort of compromise that worked for them both. She refused to believe that this was it and that she only had one option.
The new Kate wasn’t going to let that reality change what she wanted.
When Jason stopped in front of the palace, he still looked hurt and angry. There was nothing that she could say to make him feel better, and she wasn’t going to lie and make him promises that she wasn’t sure she could keep. She kissed him quickly on the cheek, then he turned and pulled her into his arms and held her close for so long that she thought he was going to try to stop her.
When he finally released her, he didn’t say a word. Kate got out of the truck, walking into the palace and taking that staircase that led to the roof, then getting into the chopper and firing up the engine.
She was already in the air when she saw movement below and recognized Lucy on the roof, yelling and waving her arms in anger. Kate pushed the throttle, ignoring the pain that welled inside her and wishing for the millionth time that her life was different.
She knew Lucy was angry, but she couldn’t bear the thought of saying goodbye.
Tears streamed down her face as she pushed the chopper to its limits and raced toward the east and the sprawling city of New Hope. It was time to get back to reality.
Her fairytale was over.
*
Kate was exhausted by the time she landed on the helipad on the White House almost half a day later. The Secret Service met her on the roof as the engine died down, but they recognized her instantly and escorted her through the roof access door to the famed Oval Office, where Pearce was taking care of whatever business was on the docket today.
“It’s nice to see you,” he said warmly when she walked into the room. “I’m surprised to see you back early, but I knew that you would see that what I was offering you was a sweet deal and one that you can’t afford to pass up.”
Kate’s hand trembled, and she shoved it into her pocket, stealing herself to be brave and to say what she came to say without apology.
“I did a lot of thinking while I was flying here,” she began.
“I’m glad. I really need you here with me. There aren’t many people in this world that I can trust, and you’re one of the elite few.” He leaned forward as if they were conspiring on some Top-Secret mission. “You can’t imagine how much of a blow to the ego it is when you discover that you’ve married someone like Marissa without having any idea of her true intentions. I used to think that I was an excellent judge of character, but now, I’m not so sure.”
“I understand, sir,” she said, and she did.
She was sure that he had been doubting himself a lot since he’d discovered that he had married a traitorous WereDragon, and she didn’t envy his position. She was sure that he was mortified by everything that had happened.
“I’m glad you came back early. I was starting to wonder if you were going to go AWOL and make me come after you.”
“No, I wouldn’t do that. But we need to talk about your offer.”
“Have you considered it? It would be a great opportunity for you, and you would be getting a huge pay raise. You can’t really beat that with a stick.”
He laughed at his own joke, but Kate just didn’t feel like joking around.
“I did consider it,” she said. “And I’m going to have to decline. A desk job isn’t who I am, and I wouldn’t be happy there no matter how much money you threw at me.”
“So, that’s just it? You’re not going to work here for me no matter how much I beg?” he asked, looking disappointed but taking her refusal better than she’d thought he would.