“Sorry.”
Gregory looked at his food. It looked delicious, and it smelled really good. But he couldn’t bring himself to eat it, not with the knot in his stomach.
“Gregory.” Moira’s expression softened. “You need to tell her how you feel. Tell her that you love her and that you want to marry her.”
“She’s not going to accept me, Mom. I’m not of her faith, so I’m not going to be her husband.”
“How do you know that?”
Gregory scowled.
“She’s already told me. I asked her to marry me the other day.”
“Wait, what?” Moira stared. “Are you serious?”
“Well, I didn’t exactly propose. But her father is arranging for her to marry someone else, and I said maybe she could marry me instead as she wanted…”
“And you made it as unromantic as possible, huh?”
“Mom, how do you make a situation like that romantic? We’ve been seeing each other, and I know she feels the same way as me.”
“She could have been playing you. Just being with you for a bit of excitement.”
But Gregory was shaking his head. He knew that was not possible.
“No, Diane’s not like that. She’s an honest person.”
“Are you certain about that? She might have been dipping her toes into the forbidden, and then she freaked out when it was threatening to become a reality.” Moira held up her hands as Gregory started to protest. “As I said, it’s a possibility. You have to be aware of that.”
“But Diane wouldn’t do that to me, Mom.”
“How do you know?” Moira insisted.
Gregory didn’t like where this was going. He wasn’t comfortable with his mother interrogating him and making him wonder if Diane was just having a fling and that was it for him. That wasn’t happening with him at all.
But it didn’t help with the doubts in his head. What if she was just doing this for a bit of rebellion, and Gregory happened to be appropriately placed? He didn’t want to think like that.
He stared at his food.
“I wish I hadn’t said anything now,” he grumbled, “you’re making me feel even worse.”
“I’m not here to stroke your ego, Gregory. I’m here to give you pragmatic advice, which you asked for if you remember?”
“I didn’t want you to say that Diane was playing around with me. I know that she’s not that sort of person. She’s probably the most honest person I’ve ever met.”
“Except when it comes to telling everyone that she’s been in a relationship with you for the last couple of months,” Moira pointed out.
“She’s honest with me, Mom. And I’ve seen the look in her eyes. She feels the same way.”
“You keep saying that, but has she actually said it? Has she told you that she loves you?”
“No…”
“Then you can’t possibly know, can you? You have to hear it before you believe anything.”
“She’s not going to listen to me, Mom. Given how scared she is of her father, I doubt I’m going to hear her say that she loves me back.”
“Then you’re stuck. You can’t get her to admit anything, but you also can’t force her to stay with you.” Moira picked up her drink again. “Honestly, Gregory, I know you like getting yourself into messes, but this is pretty big. And you have no one to blame but yourself.”
“Thanks for your support, Mom,” Gregory sneered, “delighted to know that you’re on my side.”
“Well, you knew things were different with her, and it would make it hard for the two of you, yet you carried on anyway.”
“It’s not like I could help it!” Gregory felt like he was about two inches tall. “I asked to talk to you for support, Mom, not for you to chastise me.”
“That’s not going to happen. You were warned, and you said Diane told you it wasn’t a good idea. Yet you’ve done it, and you think it’s going to work? Because you love her?”
“It’s mutual!”
“I doubt you’re going to get a response, not with her having a problem.”
“A problem.”
“She’s religious, and she’s been told what she’s doing is wrong. But she’s doing it anyway, and it’s causing her to get scared now it’s been going on for a long time.” Moira sat forward. “What if you weren’t as careful as you thought? What if she ends up pregnant? How are you going to manage things after that?”
Pregnant. Gregory felt his chest tighten. The image of Diane getting pregnant and carrying his child was a sight he wanted to see. She would look beautiful with a baby. Gregory didn’t want to see that with anyone else.
“I’ll look after her, Mom. I’m not going to abandon her.”
“Given how things are in her community, and what her father will say, I don’t think that’s going to be up to you.”
“I thought you always told me to own up to my actions, and don’t run away from them. If I get her pregnant, I’m not going to run off and leave her.”
Moira sighed.
“You might not have much of a choice. You might be run off.”
“Run off? By Gilbert?”
“He’s not going to take kindly to what happened. He might be a reasonable and kind man when it comes to his congregation, I don’t think it extends to the non-religious guy who had sex with his daughter.”
She did have a point. And that just made Gregory feel worse. He picked up his beer, glad that his mother had agreed to drive.
“What should I do, then? I want to go to her and tell her what I want, but I’m scared she’s going to reject me.”
“The best thing you can do is wait. See what happens. But don’t block your line of communication with her.” Moira reached over and touched his hand. “It’s not going to be pleasant once this gets out, but as long as you don’t go anywhere, you’ll be able to weather the storm.”
“With or without Diane?”
“I can’t really answer that.”
Gregory didn’t like the sound of that at all. He was willing to do anything for Diane, but he couldn’t keep silent forever. And the thought of losing her for good…
That just left him cold.