Chapter 5
After the talk she’d had with Leo and her brief encounter with Victor, Macy was unsure of a lot of things – including her feelings for the person who once drove her mad. She hated to think that there could have been even an ounce of truth in what Leo had told her. The mere thought that she might have been harboring feelings for Victor all this time was scary at the very least. She was not one of those people. The kind that fell in love and saw the world as perfect enough to commit yourself to just one person forever.
Forever.
That was a hell of a long time to be with one person. To see the same face when you woke up and the same face before you went to sleep. But for some reason, there were people who lived for such. They actually considered themselves lucky if they ever got to experience that.
And it was not that she was totally heartless. She had always been happy for her housemate and best friend, Leo. He seemed happy with Andre…at least until shit hit the fan and everything changed. She hated the fact that he might have been right and she was not looking to prove that either. He looked happy…he seemed happy with Andre for the longest time. And at the back of her mind, that was all she had ever wanted to do. Make sure the only person who mattered to her was happy.
Could that have been the problem? Had she focused too much on her foster brother that she had forgotten to live her life?
It had been two weeks since she saw Victor, but she could not help but think about him. About the two of them together in the captain’s office. She wanted to see him again. She wanted to be with him again and again…hopefully every night. She wanted to wake up next to him. She wanted to feel his muscular body holding her and his voice in her ear telling her that he was never going to let her go. She wanted more than just a simple fuck from Victor and that scared her. And as she stood in front of her bathroom mirror looking into her reflection, she could not really recognize the person looking back at her. She was not sure how long she had been staring into her reflection when Leo knocked on her door.
“Hey, your police scanner is going crazy out here,” he said through the door and she sighed. She knew what it meant when the police scanner went off. This was the third time she was actually thinking of ignoring the call. And as much as the move made her hate herself, she had to do it. That was the only way she was guaranteed not seeing Victor again. She had to know at least what her feelings meant before she went back to her normal routine because as things were she was more confused than ever.
Turn it off,” she said in a soft voice.
“I’m sorry, but it sounded like you told me to turn the scanner off,” Leo said and she sighed loudly as she walked out of the bathroom. She secured the belt on her bathrobe before she walked out of her room to find Leo standing out there with his arms crossed over his chest.
“That’s exactly what I said,” she said as she walked past him and made her way to the living room.
“Sweetie, I’m a little concerned about you this last couple of days…ever since that night you just up and left…” His voice trailed off as he looked at her seated in front of the TV. She looked up at him and sighed loudly. “I’m starting to get worried about you.”
“There is nothing wrong with me. I just took a few personal days.”
“Well, that’s just the thing, Macy. You never ever take personal days.” Leo shrugged. “That alone is enough to get me worried.”
“Well, I had a lot of vacation days saved up and I have to use them at some point,” she said and Leo shook his head.
“Still…” he started and she rolled her eyes.
“Why is everyone freaking out right now? All I am doing is taking a vacation.”
He shook his head as he sat down next to her. Clearly he was not the only one who was concerned.
“For as long as I’ve known you, you have always been about your work. Both your jobs…and if you were just taking time off from the bus route, that would have been something else but you are also telling me to switch off the police scanner? What’s that about?”
She looked at him and shook her head. “To be honest, Leo, I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Yeah, and you haven’t wanted to talk about it for two weeks now…what happened to our sibling code?” he asked and she looked at him.
“You cannot bring up the code in this…”
“Everything is about the code. Everything has always been about the code, Macy. You know that.” He took her hand and held it in his. “Talk to me.”
She took a long deep breath and sighed. She was not sure how she was supposed to talk about everything. There was no knowing how to start it. It was ridiculous even in her head. How was she even supposed to start?
You said something to me and I had to find out if I had feelings for the guy who made me want to shoot him in the face every time I saw him.
“Macy,” he said in a soft voice and she nodded.
“That night I left…I went to the station,” she started and he raised an eyebrow.
“The fire station?” he asked, even though he knew that it was obvious and she nodded. “Why? I never heard a call come through the scanner or anything that night.”
“I didn’t go there for work,” she said. “You said something…something that made me wonder if I had a problem. If I was maybe born with a broken heart…”
“Born with a broken heart?” Leo asked, smiling. “What does that even mean?”
“It means that I don’t even know what it feels to actually like someone, because it has never really happened to me. I am always one to bang one out and slip out in the middle of the night…remember? That’s why you said that I was a great candidate for an escort service because I don’t feel.”