Turning she stalked over to the bar. They meant well, she knew they did but this was one of those things they just couldn’t help with. She smiled at the bar tender and ordered another beer even though hers was still half full. Cora handed the money over then grabbed the beer that was handed to her, leaving her half empty one behind, and moved to go.
It was crowded enough that she kept getting bumped into and pushed around. Somebody shoved her from behind, an elbow digging into the small of her back as she was forced awkwardly forward. She slammed into another person and barely managed to stay upright. “Watch it,” she growled at whoever the rude prick was that had shoved her.
“I think maybe it’s you who needs to watch where they’re going.”
Cora’s head snapped up at the sound, her heart racing at the familiar voice despite it’s coldness. “Paolo…”
The dark eye widened slightly, but only for a moment. “Forget it, I was just leaving.” Paolo turned and pushed through the crowd in the vague direction of the door.
Swallowing the lump in her throat, Cora shoved after him, desperate to catch up. The shadows in the bar made it impossible and by the time she was through the door there wasn’t even a sign of Paolo on the street. Her chest hurt all over again, the ache that had become dulled by time and permanence was renewed to the sharp stabbing pain that hurt more than being stabbed with a sword. Cora wiped the tears away, sniffed, and took a deep breath. “This is never going to stop hurting. Why did I have to fall in love with you?”
“Because you’re an idiot.”
Cora spun around.
Paolo stood leaning against the wall beside the door, arms crossed over his Saint Laurent vest.
She hadn’t been able to sense Paolo’s presence but it wasn’t much of a surprise given her state of inebriation.
“Sorry?”
On top of everything he’d done before, now he was calling her names? She couldn’t believe how much her heart was melting. What kind of pushover was she? She needed to get a grip. Tilting her head to the side, Paolo looked her over, then shook his head. “If you still love me after everything you think I’ve done then you’re more of an idiot than I ever imagined.”
“Wow. Thanks. So I’m just supposed to switch my emotions on and off like some Mystic Falls vampire?”
Cora didn’t even know why she was arguing with him. This was far beyond a waste of time. She should just walk away. She wanted to walk away. She just couldn’t make her feet move.
“What the hell is a Mystic Falls Vampire?” Paolo asked straightening up from the wall with a frown on his face then he waved a hand in front of his face, “You know what? Never mind. Of course I don’t expect you to just switch off. It just…hurts me that you’re hurting.”
Cora snorted, “Bitch please.”
“I’m serious. It’s painful to know I’ve hurt you. It’s very surreal to me because I’ve never felt like this before. I don’t hardly know what to do with it.”
“I feel your pain,” Cora replied dryly, rolling her eyes.
Paolo stared at her quietly then sighed. “I’m–” he looked away. “—sorry Cora. I want to come clean. Yes, it started out as some sort of juvenile revenge plot against your dad. But…I mean you were there. Did that feel like pretense?”
It took a moment for Cora to process what Paolo was saying, what it meant.
“That’s not even the issue.”
Paolo frowned, “What is then?”
“I can’t trust you. You lied to me. Every day that you didn’t tell me; you lied to me. And now that you’ve been caught, all of a sudden, it’s about ‘what did you feel’? Sorry dude. I ain’t buyin’ what you’re sellin’. You want to get back at my sperm donor for something? Find another way.”
“Fair enough. How about I show you the real me then? And then when you reject me, at least you know exactly who you’re telling to fuck off.”
Cora almost laughed at that one, “Seriously?”
Paolo shrugged, “Seriously. Give me one month and let me show you the real me. You showed me who you are and I’d like to return the favor.”
Cora stared at him, “No funny business?”
“No funny business.”
“No secret evil plans?”
“None.”
“Okay then. One month.”
“Thank you Cora.”
*****
“I’ve never really connected with anyone. I’ve been in one serious relationship which ended badly. She cheated on me. I wasn’t surprised. I acted hurt, but I really wasn’t.”
“Oh? Why weren’t you?”
Paolo shrugged, “I guess…maybe I was doing what was expected of me being with her. To be honest, having the whole thing over was kind of a relief.” Paolo drank his coffee.
“I don’t believe you. The way that you talk about Gina? She had an effect on you.”
“I didn’t say she didn’t. I said, I didn’t connect. I liked her. A lot. She was a good girl and she gave me everything she could. But she didn’t take away the loneliness. She didn’t make me feel safe.”
“You don’t feel safe?”
Paolo fiddled with his cup, saw that his coffee was finished and lifted his hand to call the barista. The coffee shop around the corner from Cora’s house was empty at this late hour, so they had relative privacy. He waited for his new cup to come before he said anything.
“I didn’t know about feeling safe. Not until you asked me to leave. Then I realized that…you make me feel safe. And I know how cheesy that sounds; gratuitous even.”
‘But…?”
“But it’s the truth.”
*****
“This is where I live,” he said leading her into his apartment. It was furnished very sparsely with modern furniture.
The rooms she could see had clean, unadorned interiors. Use of natural materials such as wood, leather, teak and linen were prominent. Polished metal was predominant everywhere and the furniture was very open and raised off the floor allowing for an airy feeling. The walls were white adding to the expansive feeling. The floors were bare and where area rugs were used, they were typically wool, and neutral in color. Hints of color were used in moderation.