How Times Change

No, say it isn’t so!

To Jade’s shocked surprise, Luc responded in perfect, or at least what she thought was perfect, Italian, “Forse sarebbe rimasto per un altro polpetta?”

Maybe for another meatball?

At that Armand broke out laughing. “ Si, Lucas, si. Let me see what Armand can do…” With that, he moved off to the kitchen, the swinging doors cutting off his voice as it hummed.

Jade was still open mouthed. “When did you learn Italian?” A second thought occurred to her. “-And what did you just tell him?” She drew her frown down, suspicious.

“Oh, nothing really.“ He grabbed a mouthful of the thick ribbon tagliatelle.

“Lucas.” She pointed her fork at him.

He grinned and spoke between bites. “Fine. I told him that you thought his meatballs were substandard at best and that…what?”

She was smiling, shaking her head despite herself. “I doubt it.”

He wiped at the corner of his mouth with his fine cloth napkin, goods that Armand only trotted out for the locals. When he spoke, it was much more serious. “No. I told him you were heading out tomorrow.” He shook off the apparent funk quickly though. “I also said you might be able to be bribed to stay with one more meatball.”

Jade laughed around the pesto chicken she was just barely finishing. “I don’t think so.” She leaned back into the olive green booth cushions and breathed out. “I don’t think anyone’s ever explained portioning to Armand. Phew!”

Luc waved his fork at her plate. “So…you’re not going to finish that?’

“No. Have at it champ.” She let an easy smile work across her face as Lucas lifted her plate towards him. Looking out over the water to her right, she could see the bobbing light of the moored boats, rising and falling gently on the harbor swell. It was all so picturesque, more than she remembered. Nothing in L.A was like this. She‘d forgotten…

“Where’d you go JJ?” To her surprise, Lucas had finished both plates while she daydreamed. He was staring her way, his round glasses making his eyes look more intense. “I thought I’d lost you for a second there.” He nodded toward the harbor. “It is beautiful though isn’t it?  I don’t get back as much as I should either…”

That brought Jade back to the present. Everything about this new Luc was different, except his appetite. She was curious. “So I flew out to Cali, I’ve got an excuse. What keeps you away?”

He shuffled at his napkin. “It’s complicated.”

“How complicated could it be? You didn’t join the CIA did you?” She could see that he was working towards telling her…something, and she knew from experience the best way to get him to open up was to poke his funny bone.

“Well, I could tell you but…”

“Right, I don’t need to wind up dead before my research grant is up!” He only halfheartedly laughed at that one. Something was up. “Hey. This is JJ here. I mean, I kicked you out my room a million times, but I’m a good listener!”

He took a sip of this Trimbach, a white that Armand only rolled out for ‘special guests’. “I’ll get to it, JJ.” Setting down the goblet he cleared his throat.

Is that liquid courage? What’s goin’ on in that head of yours Gnat? She was almost afraid to ask, because with Lucas, it could be anything.

“JJ, I wanted to tell you how good it was to see you back in town.” No joking. She could tell he meant it. He was quick to add, “Not just me. Everybody’s been talking about it since the reception.”

Jade had been around enough men to know the signs of a cover up. What she was having a harder time with was why. Luc was trying to tell her something that she wasn’t sure she wanted to hear. Danbury was her safe space – unbidden, the walk on the beach to the car, Luc’s easy smile, the something so different about him flooded through her mind. Luc’s easy voice snapped her back to reality.

“JJ?” He had taken his glasses off and set them next to his plate. For the first time since she’d been home, she noticed the emerald flecks up close and the way the table lights caught them. The fact that it was Gnat Peters sitting across the table from her momentarily drowned in those eyes.

Mercifully, Armand showed up at the table. The spell broke and Jade found herself too eager to see whatever it was that the round chef had brought them.

“No more meatballs bambini.” He set a beautiful old world silver tray down between them. “But I do have this!” With a flourish he pulled the dome off and revealed the most elegant, decadent tiramisu that Jade had ever seen. At any other time, the amaretto holiness that was wafting off the fresh made dessert would have been sinful heaven. Now, though…

Now she was staring inwardly at a feeling that had been gnawing at her since she’d first gone to Evie’s wedding. Her little boy, Evie’s Luc, Jade’s Gnat, was not the same. And the difference was taking her places in her mind that she hadn’t walked down in two years- and would never want to walk with Lucas.

Nerdy Lucas. Geeky, gawky Lucas. Beanpole awkward Lucas. Tall, tanned, trim Lucas, with the dimple smile and the Clark Kent glasses….Her stomach lurched.

Armand noticed. “Bambina are you A-Okay?”

Lucas had noticed as well. “Jade, you don’t look so..”

She reached for her purse, flustered. “I’m fine. I just…Armi, I’m sorry, it’s not your food, I promise. I think I may have overdone it.”

“Always, it’s not you, it’s me.” The short round chef nodded in fake sympathy. Lucas seemed troubled, though. She refused to look into those eyes again. She pushed out of the booth, standing.

“I think I’m going to call it a night boys. Armi, it’s been so good to see you.” She planted a quick kiss on the chef’s cheek and turned to Luc, using the rotund Italian as a safety shield. “Gnat, I’m sorry, but I’m going to go. I’m just not myself tonight.”

“Let me at least give you a ride back to the hotel!” He started to move to the edge to stand. Jade stopped him with an upturned hand.

“No need, Luc. It’s only a mile from here on the beach walk and I need the air. “Lord that is true. And not to be alone in a car with you with this wine in my head…

She could tell he was disappointed from the drop down corners of his eyes.  In some way, so was she but- he reached into his pocket and pulled out a pen, scrawling on his napkin with it. In a smooth motion he put it away, and handed her the folded cloth.

Eyes full of questions he graciously kept to himself, he spoke. “My number JJ. When you get home, give me a call, hm?” A quick frown creased his brow as he added. “I hope you feel better.”

Jade stowed the cloth napkin in her purse, trying very hard not to notice the brush of his hand as it faded back. In her hand the texture of the cloth was different, alive somehow. She couldn’t wait to let it fall into the depths of her purse. When she did speak it was soft. “I will…and I will.”

She knew she should have said goodnight. She should have tried to explain to Luc how unbalanced everything was in her head just now. And tell him what JJ? That you are having strange feelings? He’s going to think you overdid the carbonara…Choosing to stow all of that, until the wine cleared, Instead she exited for the beach, letting the doors swing closed behind her.

Left behind in the restaurant, Luc and Armand watched her go, both of them looking at the doorway for a moment.

Armand spoke first. “Quel bambino ha difficoltà nella sua mente stasera.”

That child has trouble on her mind tonight.

Luc nodded,  “So come si sente.”

I know how she feels.