His Surrogate For Hire

Chapter 5

It only took about a month to settle in. The feeling that the rug would be pulled from under her was starting to dissipate. She could finally relieve some of the stress of the changes that happened recently. Relieving that stress was going to be a vital part of getting pregnant.

Clay had been out of town the entire month so there was no pressure there. Diana could relax from the feeling that her employer was watching her every move. Although it was great to have all of her needs taken care of, she had always worked for herself and she was used to making her own money. Diana just decided to treat it as the blessing it was and take every day as it came to her.

The trials started for the insemination. Never had Diana thought about meeting the right man, getting pregnant, and having a family. That seemed so far off for her. She had not gotten her career where she wanted it and with losing her job, Diana felt like she was backtracking now. She was unsure how she would reach all of the dreams and goals she had for herself. They now seemed unattainable. And finding love was like the unicorn in all of the fairy tales she read; beautiful, treasured, but not real.

Staring out into the garden, Diana tried to figure out how her life had gotten to this point. Sure, being a surrogate was a blessing for a potential parent that was physically unable to bear children, but it was a concept Diana never thought of before she needed the money.

Diana never envisioned herself as the type that would do things because of the money. She wanted to make sure her priorities did not get out of line. There was much she wanted out of life and she did not want one little thing like losing her job and her livelihood to derail that.

But she was starting to think maybe Teresa was right. Maybe there was something there with Clay. There had to be something to learn from the entire experience. Clay was a smart businessman with many connections. There was no way she should walk away from the situation without having collected something. She wanted more in her life and she wanted, most of all, to make sure she had some type of financial security so she was never in this predicament again.

Waiting was killing her. Diana had never been the most patient woman in the world, but she would have to wait to see if she was pregnant. It would take a few weeks to see if the procedure was successful. In the meanwhile, Charlotte made it clear that Diana was to stay on her exercise and diet regimen. The woman was sweet but no nonsense when it came to business.

Most people would not complain about being able to be kept in a mansion with people waiting on her hand and foot. Most would not complain about the ability to be able to have all of her expenses paid for. And Diana was not complaining about those things either. She just wanted one other thing to make her life complete.

Love.

It was not a subject she had even truly given much thought to until she met Clay. She spent most of her time working and not giving herself time to start or nurture a relationship. Love was such a foreign concept for her. Seeing lovers out strolling hand in hand, kissing, staring into each other’s eyes made her think she could one day have that type of love too. She had not seen that in her own home growing up. Her father had done the best he could to raise a young girl on his own. Diana remembered the perpetual look of mourning he wore on his face after her mother died. It was like he never got over losing the love of his life.

Diana never wanted to feel like that. A few years ago, it dawned on her that maybe she did not seek love in attempts to avoid it so she would never know what it was like to lose someone. She watched the lights dim in his eyes when her mother passed away and now with him living in a nursing home, she felt her own sense of loss. She did not want to endure the loss of having love, feeling love, and then having it snatched away from her.

Somewhere along the lines, she supposed that not having love at all was better than having it and losing it. So far, that kind of thinking had served her well. It kept her heart protected. She thought maybe she could have a shot at love later in life, when things settled financially and she had her career in line. It was something she continued to push to the back of her mind, but now that she was a surrogate, ready to bring life into the world. That had to count for something. And then there was Clay. He was, for all intents and purposes, the kind of man she should go for, but with the current situation at hand, that would make for an improper opportunity to seek love.

She squeezed the pillow closer to her. The only thing she would be doing now would be to do as she was asked and put everything on hold to ensure she brought a healthy baby in to the world. Love would once again have to wait.

*****

Another month and another negative pregnancy test. The first had been a false positive, this one was just plain negative. Diana was starting to feel frustrated. She had not thought about what would happen if it was hard to get pregnant. Getting pregnant was not something she had ever tried to do before and she never thought about what would happen if the pregnancy took a bit longer than expected. Diana assumed since she was doing the insemination, things would work out quickly. The longer it took for her to get pregnant, the more Diana could feel her opportunity slipping away.

There was no clause specifically in any of the contracts that spoke to what would happen if she did not get pregnant, but she did not want to rock the boat on the issue. The one thing she wanted to do was see this through.

The town car brought her back to the mansion. As they waited for the gate to open, Diana suddenly felt dread. She hoped no one was there so she would not have to look anyone else in the eye and admit she was once again not pregnant. It was hard to deal with the anticipation and the roller coaster of emotions.

Fortunately, only the chef was in the kitchen. Diana stopped in to grab something to eat on her way back to her room. After eating, she would go to the studio and do some yoga to calm herself and relax. Charlotte would be back soon, inquiring about the results of the pregnancy test and she would have to disclose the results.

Taking her food to her room, Diana tried not to think about what would happen if she did not get pregnant. That would be an entire opportunity to change her life down the drain. To watch that happen would devastate her. It was not often the chance to completely overhaul her life came along in one neat and tidy package.

Once in her suite, she kicked off her shoes and set the food on the cocktail table. This was the kind of lifestyle that could spoil her very quickly. She had all but forgotten about how it felt to be stressed about the end of her lease and the fact that she lost her job. It felt good not to worry about those things.

The food was so good, her full stomach lulled her to sleep. The sound of a light tapping at her door woke her. She felt disoriented, trying to figure out what time it was.

“Hold on.” She slid her feet in to her slippers and made her way to the door. Opening it, she greeted Charlotte.

“Come on in.”

Charlotte was surprisingly wearing casual clothing.