Chapter 4
She didn’t know why she kept sacrificing her Sundays for this. She could be anywhere in the world right now – she could be floating down the Nile on a barge in a leopard-print pantsuit to the tune of Tame Impala’s classic tune New Person Same Old Mistakes. But no, tragically, she was standing on her mother in law’s doorstep with a store bought box of Danish, listening to her nemesis, Mike Sanderson sing along to his daughter’s inharmonious rendition of “I Wanna Hold Your Hand.” The sun was obnoxiously bright and forcing her temples to beat hideously, her hangover making her guts churn.
What was this Faustian hell called? The door swung open, and she and her mother in law exchanged air kisses. “You look gorgeous!” Sarah said. “Come on in, Jaden made a pitcher of iced tea and I’m just getting the quiche out of the oven.”
Sadie’s stomach lurched. “Ugh. Are there any words in the English language more disgusting than ‘iced tea’?”
“Hey Ms. Alexander!” Mike piped up from the living room. “Michaela and I are battling it out on the karaoke machine! Want to play spoiler and see if you can do better than her best Janet Jackson impression?”
“Oh call her Sadie,” Sarah said.
“That wasn’t a question, universe,” Sadie muttered, and slumped her way into the house proper.
Mike selected “Rhythm Nation” and held out his hand. “Come on! Let’s show these young uns what it’s all about!”
“I’m sorry I don’t sing.”
“Aww, don’t be a spoil sport now. I know you can sing with them dulcet tones of your voice. Give it a go Sadie,” protested Mike.
“Yeah mom, give it a go!” Jaden interjected.
“Ugh I don’t know…” Sadie said.
“Come on,” Mike insisted. “If you stop having fun, you can have all of my boar and scallion strata.”
“What is that?” sighed Sadie, who took his hand, stood up, and seized the microphone with authority.
“My contribution to this wonderful meal. I made it last night for our lunch.”
“Oh. I didn’t know we derailed your lunch plans,” Sadie said.
Mike shook his head, “You didn’t derail them. You made them all better. This is a significant improvement from just me and Michaela at our lunch table.”
“Oh. You don’t live with…anyone else,” Sadie asked even as she felt silly and intrusive for asking.
“Nope. Just the two of us. And our lovely housekeeper June of course.”
“Of course,” Sadie agreed sardonically turning back to the music.
She could work with this. Janet was her boo, and ‘What have you done for me lately’ was one of her all-time favorite karaoke tunes. Harmonizing with Mike left a bit to be desired, but she totally nailed that undercurrent of demandingness that Janet brought to the song. She wasn’t enough of a bass to get everything really deep-throated going, but hey – who could when they weren’t the Goddess Janet? When the song finished, a round of applause filled the room, and Mike was actually grinning at her.
“Wow, you are an excellent singer! You should definitely audition for our choir,” Mike said, then instantly grew regretful. “I hope I’m not being too presumptuous.”
“You definitely are being presumptuous,” Sadie said.
“Sadie!” Sarah gave her a look.
“No,” Mike said, “I deserved that. Come on, Sarah, let’s prove it to these kids that we’ve got what it takes!”
They did “R-E-S-P-E-C-T by Aretha” in what was perhaps the most disturbingly harmonious manner Sadie had ever seen.
“That was so beautiful!” Jaden said. “I wanna sing like that too.”
“If it’s good enough for your grandmother it’s good enough for you,” Sadie said, sipping her disgustingly alcohol free iced tea.
*****
Brunch was, at least, sumptuous enough to make up for the humiliation of the karaoke party. Sadie found herself digging into her mother in law’s incredible quiche and Mike had brought dulce de leche cinnamon rolls to round out the meal. She sank her teeth into one with a sigh and flopped down into place next to Jaden.
“Sadie, honey, are you seeing anybody special?” her mother in law asked suddenly.
She almost choked on her role. “Noo. Why would you ask that?”
Sarah flicked an almost unnoticeable glance at Mike before saying, “No reason,” in a soft voice.
“Well, no I’m not dating and you know that.”
“But I heard-“ Sarah began and Sadie felt the burning need to stop her right there.
“Jaden would you mind getting me some ice-cream?” she asked her son.
“Sure mom,” he replied leaping to his feet.
“I’m not seeing anybody. And no, please, please don’t set me up with anyone Sarah.” She whispered once her son was out of the room.
“But I know a guy who’d be great for you! He loves epic poetry, motorcycles, dance, exotic dancing…” Sarah said tongue in cheek.
“Please, please no,” Sadie said.
“Fine,” Sarah said. “But I bet by the end of brunch you’re going to be begging me for his number.”
*****
She was nowhere close to begging for anyone’s number as she watched Mike clear the table. Though 911 would be preferable. Sweet, sweet emergency services, take me away, she thought to herself. Sarah had brought the photo albums out and soon she was staring at pictures of Jaden dressed up as a puppy dog, of old Halloweens and awkward school plays. The last picture on the page, though, really got her going. Not in a good way.
“Oh…is this Ben?” she asked pointing at it.
“Yeah. It was last Christmas after he was discharged from the army. Remember? His arm was completely useless at the time.” Sarah’s voice shook and Sadie regretted asking. Mike leaned forward to study the picture.
“He was a handsome man. Your husband’s brother is that right?” he asked Sadie.
“Yes. My late husband Maury. He died in Afghanistan.”
“I’m sorry for your loss.”
“Thank you.”
*****
Two hours later she was free once more. Mike insisted on walking her to her car to her everlasting chagrin. She didn’t want him to turn out to be a gentleman. In fact she wished he would show his asshole side more overtly so other people could see it.
“So I kind of get the feeling that you don’t like me much,” he said as they stopped at her car door. Jaden was already clambering in the back as he made plans with Michaela to do something or other in school the next day.
“What gave me away?” Sadie asked sardonically.
“I don’t know,” he shrugged, “maybe the look in your eyes? Like you’re waiting for me to go for your jugular or something.” He smiled as he said it.
Sadie looked down, “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable,” she said insincerely.