Dark Or Cream

“I know! Listen, I made a mistake. I chose the wrong guy. I picked him because he seemed to have his future all worked out, and that made me feel comfortable, stable, but I was wrong, Eric. I can admit it, I was wrong, and I am so sorry for what I said to you.” She inhaled sharply.

“That’s the problem, Kaj. The whole time you’ve been comparing me to somebody else. I don’t have a fu*king five year plan, you know why? Cause my plan every day is just to live and live fully. Hell, in five years I’ll probably still have this house, and that pickup truck. Only difference is they’ll be paid off. I’ll probably still be at the lawnmower shop cause I own it. It’s mine. I wish you never would’ve tried to measure me up against the worth of another man, cause the only man I know how to be is me, Kaja.”

“I get it,” she said, nodding. “I get that now.”

“Then, why are you here?”

“Because I want to tell you my five year plan, Eric. You see, I like to know what’s coming up next. I’ve got to-do lists for ten years from now, okay? I like to feel prepared, but the truth is you never really know. It’s like baking a cake. You gotta know the right ingredients, the right steps and hope it comes out right, but anything might go wrong. Unless you have the recipe. See, if I have the right recipe then I don’t have to wonder what my next step will be. That’s why I thought it was so important that I know what you wanted to do with your life, but I was wrong. Because love isn’t a recipe. I don’t know if any of this is making sense to you, Eric, but we’re making this from scratch.” She began walking up to the tractor as she spoke. “And, with you, all the ingredients feel right. You mix right into my life. I don’t know if that means we’re meant to be together, but I don’t think that it means we’re meant to be apart. I want to see what we can make together, Eric. Please! I want to see what we can make…” She stared up at his silent face and felt like his muteness said it all. Her lips began to tremble again and a fresh wave of tears began to fall.

He grunted in response. He swiped at his face with the back of his hand and said, “Cherry pie.”

Kaja gave a broken laugh and said, “Yes. Yes! Cherry pie! I want cherry pie with you.”

He reached down to her, and she slipped her hand into his. Then, he pulled her up onto the tractor, straddled her across his lap. His cowboy hat fell from his head and rolled across the new mown hay. He put his arms around her and his lips descended on hers with searing heat, like an oven that was waiting for the pan.

The end.