Carrying His Baby

Chapter 8

Hallie felt that mixture of dread and anticipation building as she rode up that elevator.

The last time, she had barely seen the elevator. She had only seen Aldous.

To be fair, she’d been in such a state that she had seen a couple of Aldouses unless she squinted and looked out of the side of her eyes. She had been pretty plastered.

But now, she was completely sober, and she could still feel his presence.

The door opened and she saw him. He moved to her and took her hands. She saw a shadow of everything she felt in his eyes, too, and couldn’t stop herself.

She raised her face to his and whispered, “Aldous. I missed you.”

Aldous pulled her into his arms. She felt it as if she was in a dream. She closed her eyes as she saw his face coming closer to hers. She could feel his warm breath on her skin and that made her heart flutter madly.

He didn’t kiss her lips as she expected. He kissed her forehead, but it wasn’t just affection in the kiss. She felt the heat searing her.

She felt his lips move to her cheeks, kissing both. She felt his fingers under her chin, raising her face to his, and her lips parted of their own volition. She felt his lips find hers, finally, pulling her into an agony of need when she felt his tongue slip out and touch her lips. She felt him taste her and she shivered, moaning his name.

“Aldous…”

She felt his arms around her, sliding along her waist, and didn’t feel big. She felt light, as if she were floating.

But she wanted more than this gentleness. She wouldn’t break. She needed him to know that.

Her hands slipped up his back and into his hair, gripping and pulling him down.

Hallie’s eyes were large and dark, awake with passion. Her lips were parted and swollen from his kisses. She was gasping.

Aldous looked horrified.

“Oh God, Hallie, I’m so sorry! I didn’t meant to do that. I don’t know what I… I’m so sorry!”

That was not what Hallie wanted to hear.

He would’ve gone on digging himself deeper, but his phone beeped again persistently.

“I… Just a second, I’ll take care of this quickly,” said Aldous and moved away to take the call.

Hallie was flabbergasted. She was embarrassed.

She had obviously built it all up in her head on the way over there. Aldous hadn’t wanted that to happen.

She needed to leave. She couldn’t deal with this now. She had just made up her mind to leave, almost turned around to leave, when Aldous came back.

“Hallie, you’re still standing there. I’m so sorry!”

They walked into the living room and sat down. He had sparkling water with lemon, her current favorite drink, all ready for her.

How could things be so awkward now when a few minutes ago, they’d been all but lapping each other up in great, greedy gulps?

“Aldous…”

“Hallie…”

“No, you go first,” said Aldous.

Hallie took a deep breath.

“Aldous, I think we need to talk about what’s going to happen in a few months.”

Aldous’s face fell, just a bit, before he covered it up with charm, again.

“Well, you’ll have our baby. Everything’s all set with the hospital. The plan is in place. Right?”

“After that, Aldous,” said Hallie.

But he had known that, of course.

He didn’t want to talk about it. He didn’t want to talk about it because he wanted Hallie. Every moment he’d spent with her the last few months had been heaven and hell. It had been heaven to be with her, know that their child was in her.

It was hell not to be able to cover her large belly with his hand, to kiss her when they felt their baby move. It was hell not to hold her close when he fell asleep. It was hell not to know everything before Jack told him.

It was hell to know that he would be giving up both her and their child soon.

It was unfair. He had agreed to the arrangement. It had been the arrangement he wanted. But now he wanted more. Now he wanted her.

She probably resented him for how her life had turned upside down because he hadn’t used protection. But he couldn’t help but wonder how it would be to wake up to Hallie every morning. To know that their child was sleeping close by.

He even wanted to change diapers. But he didn’t know how to tell her any of this. If he had to wait until their child had been adopted, and Hallie was back to standing on her own two feet again, he would. Because he wanted to be with Hallie. He hadn’t made that much time for her out of duty, or because it was the right thing to do. He had done it because he was falling for Hallie.

He loved her spirit. He loved how she had handled something that would’ve knocked him off his stride. He loved her pragmatic nature. He loved how she stood for no nonsense from him, and tried to be as independent as possible.

He didn’t want to give up the child.

Maybe…

He considered the idea. It might work.

“I have an unconventional idea to propose, Hallie.”

Hallie waited.

“Would you be willing to let me raise the baby?”

Hallie stared.

Of all the things in the world he could’ve said, she had not anticipated that.

“Aldous, do you have the slightest comprehension of what you’re talking about?”

He must have lost his mind, thought Hallie.

“You know I have the resources.”

“Raising a child isn’t just about resources. I know you have the money. But you don’t have the time. You don’t have the patience. You definitely don’t have the slightest clue how to deal with babies!”

“Nobody starts out as a baby expert! All parents learn as they go along.”

“Aldous, you’re not making any sense! Seriously, you’re making absolutely no sense! You know you can’t raise the baby. You will hire a nanny. Hell, you’ll probably hire an army of nannies. But that’s not what I want for this baby. I want this baby to have parents he can rely on. Parents who’ll be there for him the first time he skins his knees, who’ll make his hurts all better. Parents who have the time to go to whatever practice he wants to go for. Parents who will get to know all his friends, and who will drive everybody for ice cream. I want him to have love, and warmth, and a real family.”

Hallie could feel the tears threatening. Ruthlessly, she shoved them away.

“You can’t give a baby that, Aldous. You know you can’t.”

He was silent for a moment.

“I could retire.”

Hallie gaped.