Carla’s Prince

Chapter 10

It was a little after midnight and Carla was all alone in the apartment. Brenda had gone to Pete’s earlier that evening and considering the time, Carla was quite sure that she was not going to come back not that she had any reason to. Carla had been quite the party pooper lately. Overworking always seemed to get her mind off things but even after taking on a new assignment that she was working on side by side with Cristoff’s case, she still found herself thinking about Cristoff. It was almost inevitable. It had been just a couple of days since she kicked Cristoff out but with every passing second, she regretted it. She kept on wondering why she had not given him more of a chance to explain himself. There was so much she would have wanted to ask him, so much she would have wanted to hear him say but it was so clear to her that he was not the opening up type. She had been right to think of him as an embodiment of the fictitious Christian Grey. The dark personality and the intense s*x that she seemed to like so much.

Frankly, the more she thought about him, the more confused she felt. She wanted him, of that she was sure, but she wanted a different version of him. She wanted a man she could talk to. She wanted a man she could lean on but she was not so sure Cristoff was that kind of man. Maybe things were different in his world.

She walked to the kitchen and reheated a slice of leftover pizza before she made her way back to her room. She sat on her bed and looked at her computer screen. She had put on a show earlier in an effort to get her mind off things but she had not really been paying attention to it. She wanted to rewind it, pay more attention to it but this would be the second time she was doing it. It was not like the first time had gone so well.

She bit into her pizza slice and leaned back as she thought whether to just get a new show or give it up altogether. She took another bite of her pizza and heard her phone vibrating wildly against the nightstand. She looked at it for a long time and bit her lower lip. The notification tone was enough for her to know that it was either a text or an email but at the back of her mind, she knew whatever it was, was actually from Cristoff. Her heart was suddenly racing as she sat there wondering if she should just ignore the phone or pick it up and see what he had to say. This was not new to her. She had been trying to ignore his messages but she always ended up reading them eventually.

“There is no point trying,” she thought. “You are going to read it anyway, Carla.”

She threw her head back and exhaled loudly. A part of her was screaming for her to pick that phone up while the other said that there was a possibility that it was not him at all. It could have been Brenda. Or those annoying marketing websites she had somehow subscribed to in a quest to start a new career.

“Fu*k it.”

She reached for her phone and looked at it, her fingers trembling. She had thought right. It was an email from Cristoff. Her heart was beating so hard and so fast she could almost feel it. She opened the email and gasped silently when she saw the first line.

RE: I THINK I LOVE YOU…

Carla, I do not know what to say or how to say it. I am a fool, of that I am sure. A few weeks ago, I sat in an office and saw the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on and she stole my heart but I think I may have made her see my ugly side, the side that the world sees… the only side that I have ever worn for anyone who knows me.

I cannot say that I have ever loved anyone. The closest person to me is my sister Isabella. I truly treasure her, I always have, but I cannot say that I love her, maybe because I do not know what love is or maybe because I do not know how to feel about certain things. If ever I was capable of love, then I would feel it for her but lately, you are the only other person who makes me feel that way. The only person who makes me hate myself because I know how much I brought you pain. My sister, Isabella, has told me that I can be a bit closed in and I promise you right now that I am willing to let you in if you only give me the chance.

Carla, I cannot live without you. I want you by my side. I want to sleep next to you and wake up next to you, to have your beauty be the first thing I see in the morning and the last one I see at night. I think I love you, Carla. I want you every single day, every single moment…I love you to the ends of the world and back.

I know that everyone has baggage and that I come with a whole lot more baggage than most but I am willing to work through it as long as I have you by my side. Talk to me, Carla. Just let me know what I have to do and I will do it.

All my love,

Cristoff

She put the phone down and bit her lower lip. Those were perhaps the rawest words she had ever heard from him. Well, granted, she had read the words but it had been his voice. She ran her fingers through her thick hair and felt her eyes well up. She was more confused than ever. She was not so sure what she was supposed to do. She wanted him so much but the more she wanted him, the more she thought about what a relationship with him would actually mean. He was a complicated man whose entire life was in the limelight which meant that if she agreed to a relationship with him, her life would be in the limelight too. He was right, he did come with a lot of baggage.

“Fu*k,” she thought as she sat there.

She put her half-eaten pizza aside and reached for her computer. She did not know why but she Googled him. She did not really know what she was looking for or why she was doing it but she did it anyway.

“Berkshire?” she said under her breath when the search results came in. She did not even know that he had left the country. But it was the next headline that made her heart skip a beat.

“Danish Prince gets cozy with Countess ex-girlfriend,” she read and let her phone drop to her lap. “What the fu*k?” she muttered when she saw the picture. It was Cristoff standing with a long legged brunette who had her arms around his neck.

                                                                        *****

The funeral took longer than Cristoff would have wanted but that was how formal events always were. He managed to maintain a smile throughout the event but there was just one thing that got to him: Stephanie’s presence there. On such days, he would have preferred it if he would just slip out silently but those were not one of those days. This was different. He had to stay there because he was not just there to honor a dead man, he was also there as the Prince of Denmark. He was representing an entire country. His entire country. He sipped on a glass of juice as he feigned interest in whatever Isabella and her friend were talking about, all the while counting the minutes until he got out of there.

When he could not take it anymore, he excused himself and walked out into the garden. The lush green gardens were the only thing he had to calm him down.

He did not know how long he had been standing there when he heard Stephanie’s dreaded voice. He turned around and looked at her, failing even at the hardest attempt to force a smile at her.

“Stephie,” he said as he looked at her in the low-neck maxi dress she had revealing her generous cleavage.

“Cristoff. I didn’t know you would be here.”

“It is a gathering of European royals. Where else would I be?”

“You know I have been asking myself that very question especially since I have tried reaching you for the longest time.”

He shook his head.

“Why?” he asked.